i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
