dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
