Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
You are a genius and a whore.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
