I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
