when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
