He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
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