yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Your dad touched me again.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
