yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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