She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
