i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
