She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Randomize
