Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
