how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize