Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
