Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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