The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize