i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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