Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I still have a little drunk in my system
I have tasted many bathrooms
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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