I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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