I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
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he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
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I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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