I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
