worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
