Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I enjoy the company of your penis
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
