god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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