Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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