matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
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