bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
