Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
