where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
