some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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