He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
