this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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