your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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