it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
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i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
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