We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
