You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
