She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
