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Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
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