I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
