There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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