People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
