come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
