Already got asked if we're dating
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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