at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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