i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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