Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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