went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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