You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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