I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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