Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
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